Run, Girl, Run!

I am not a skinny girl by any means. I have always struggled a bit with the battle of the chub-ha! Most of high school and a lot college was spent in an unhealthy cycle of trying to lose weight. I wasted a lot of years riding the highs and lows of how loose or tight my jeans fit-and let's face it, it is never fun to have tight jeans! As I have gotten older I have found that the best way (for me) to keep a proper perspective on looks is exercise. My preferred form of exercise is running outside( I know LOTS of girls who HATE running, but love to walk, bike ride, dance, etc...I say whatever works for ya!). I enjoy taking in nature and fresh air, the change of scenery, and the chance to process. Not only is running good for me physically, but I have found that I am healthier mentally, emotionally, and spiritually when I am working out consistently. Herein lies the dilemma................

I have the HARDEST time running consistently!
It is such a mental thing for me! I can honestly run on Friday, and have myself convinced by Monday that I CANNOT do it! In my mind it becomes this insurmountable thing that I CANNOT overcome! I don't know why I do this!! Some of it could be pride. I want to look like the picture of the fit girl running, and not so much like Homer running off the jelly rolls-ha(Please don't judge my picture of Homer....it just happened to depict my feelings so exactly I HAD to post it-ha)! I think my mind just says "I CANNOT subject myself to huffing my jiggly self down the road for God and everybody to see!" Totally self defeatist I KNOW! Obviously, consistent running would help with those jiggles, but it is whether I am willing to struggle through the not pretty, difficult aspects of running to achieve THAT GOOD THING (maybe not looking like the fit running girl, but being healthy and honoring the LORD with my body)!

I think it is the same in my spiritual life. So often I don't want to work on those ugly parts of me that God reveals...I want to hide them under the attire of flattering actions and pleasing words. Sometimes getting in shape spiritually means other people see my jiggly parts as I am working on them. Sometimes it means people are going to be grossed out or pitying when they see my lack of perfection and my sinful trouble spots all hanging out there. It comes down to whether or not I am willing to be humiliated today for the healthier tomorrow? Am I willing to let God break through my facade of beauty, and really work on the lumps and bumps? Does not wanting other to see me as unattractive keep me from dealing with and working on areas in my life? I guess what I am saying is that I'm not going to go out running in my sports bra and short shorts. But if you are offended by the sight of a imperfect girl jogging by you in sweats-I apologize...I'm just trying to get in shape;)!
"...Let us throw off everything that hinders, and the sin that so easily entangles, and LET US RUN with perseverance the race that is marked out for us." Hebrews 12:1